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Saturday, October 27, 2012

Scarves & Sleeves

Scarves & Sleeves

I want to wear it
But not wear it
Is my vanity so apparent?
Confusion lies
Where truth reveals
Between my head
And what your minds unveil

Sharp words better off unspoken
In the dark when hearts are open
Bites of flesh with every sentence
Narrow my way to your acceptance
But wide is the way to His embrace
Away from your judgements
Away from your disgrace

That Day I will stand alone
Sins n All, to each his own
When everyone will speak for their soul
Why do you pretend to know?
That between fire and garden
Is a piece of cloth tightly woven?
Truth be told, no one knows
Let the Judge be Judge
And Uphold not your petty grudge

My heart is weak, Just as yours
But my heart lacks your open sores
With the likeness of a bird
That can no longer soar
Your words inflict these wounds
Upon me and those who bruise
A piece of cloth stands between
Your congratulation
And your view of my salvation
Pardon me, how can that be?
I acknowledge my responsibility

I want to wear it
But not wear it
Will I lose my specialty?
That lies with those
With pious clothes
Will I be freed?
Or lose a sense of belonging?
The silent nods between
Those who don this deen
With pretty scarves,
And lace-y sleeves,
Become silent screams
For those that leave
Why do you care?
Let hair be hair
And uphold not your troubled stares

Could it be jealousy
Or my lack of stability?
Conformity, you will not find me
Tell your friends they're OCD
Tell them to find my heart
It lies not within a cloth
But between myself and the Supreme
Who are they to intervene?

Feel my heart
How it bleeds
My femininity
Vain it is,
But may the day come
When I will disdain
My then loose scarves
And my short sleeves
Am I at loss?
When I wish to be
Pretty like those on TV?
Perhaps, but then, does that mean
I cannot feel the breeze?
Or the warm sand beneath my feet?
Or feel the sun kiss my skin?
Which curbs my hair from growing thin?

Not while bare but in modesty
For I do not stand for nudity
I may aspire femininity
But conservatively
I may love frills and lace
But I love not needless displays

If I shall choose to wear my hair
Covered or outside in the air
Then let me be and drop your stares
Your admonition I don't care
As long as righteousness gets me there
Or did you not hear, That Allah has said
The best garment is righteousness instead?
If you believe not, see 7:26
Im tired of being played by peoples' tricks

If you shall say, see 24:31
That it describes the righteous one
I reply that my biggest fear
Is not my hair or arms or ears
But if I had done enough good today?
Have I given? Have I prayed?
Have I read His Words?
Have I strayed?

Not my neck, feet or arms
By your perception, I am alarmed
To think piety and acceptance go not beyond
A tightly woven piece of cloth
Go tell that to those
Who were hung on trees
For a skin color that didn't please*
Those who say words as these
For humans are not skin or cloth deep
Whether it covers bodies or just hair
To Allah we are naked and bare

Note that I fully acknowledge
That it may be preferred
To cover my hair
But please be aware
That Allah is Just and Fair
He said "La ekraaha fil deen"
Will you then not take heed?
Your only vice is that I not wear
My piety and deeds on my sleeve
But your superficiality makes you unaware
Of how hard you make girls weep

Help me when I am naked
When I am bare
When my sexuality is too out there
When I walk and prance
In an arrogant stance
When I sway my hips
For eyes to look
And men to drool
Advise me, then and there
But do not duel with me
About my arms, feet and hair

And to my brothers, weak and brave
Please remember to lower your gaze,
For you can only judge and blame
What you've let your eyes graze
How can you when you have not
Known a woman by her heart?
No eyes will be deterred by cloth
Nor will hands
Asks the women across my land

Alas I end this with an inquiry
Of honest love and sincerity
For indeed my deepest desire
Is to rejoice with you for eternity
In endless gardens
And flowing streams
Will you then halt your pestering?
And work together towards this dream?

Madiha Mostafa K.
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*I apologize for the race part. It is not to belittle or offend Africans , for I am African myself, but It is used as a metaphor for those that are quick to figuratively hang those who take off hijab or don't wear it. and non figuratively since there are those who kill women for not wearing it. What they have in common in the dissatisfaction of the masses towards what appears on the outside of a person, and judging them not by their hearts and who they are.

1 comment:

Mom said...

I love your poem, your insight and bravery..I love you and I love the facts, and not being a pacifier for the public or father, bu to be free woman and girl, and to be able to be in the sun , my hair fell out from being covered , and my bones lack sun for best bones, I need sun when ever I can get it , and female hormones make me sweat in the uniform of piety , and all I had to do was behave a certain good way, instead of sweating in the clothes and nearly fainting....